Little Girl Blues

Little Girl Blues

She didn’t feel pretty inside and out
Her mother didn’t know what this was all about
Last time she knew, she was with her father
But everytime she would ask questions, Mya said she didn’t want to be bothered.
What was causing Mama’s Little Girl Blues?
What was making her not go to school?
Who was putting the marks on her neck?
How about the big sunglasses when it wasn’t even light yet?

Daughters Response: Mama I’m having the blues
When I go over there he make me take off my shoes, and than my clothes,
Oh Lucky Me! you didn’t never recognize the fear in me?
He touches my body and my soul freeze, if I resist Mama my nose bleed.
He was suppose to be my first love, not literally, I don’t have a relationship
Well normal , He’s sick, disgusting, and immoral. Mama I got the blues, if only you knew.
I can’t go to school because it consume my mind, the thought of my Father’s body on top of mine.
I couldn’t tell this secret, because of the gun behind my head, but I’m not afraid anymore, Im No Longer Scared.
He claim he love me, tough love indeed, what kind of father makes his daughter carry his seed? So, with this said I take my life, NO MORE PAIN & NO MORE Fight! *Pow* No more Blues From Fear & Lies.

A Mother Final Letter That Went UnSent:
Baby its not you, it was your father, what real man would have relations with his daughter
If only I noticed you wouldn’t been scarred this way, I wish I coulda took the pain from your face, the pain, the strain, that lives behind your eyes from him touching you between your thighs.
You could have come to me, and told me your blues, you was born to me, so protect you I would,
I mean without a doubt, that’s why I’m writing this from jail don’t you see what this is all about,
You was born to love not fear your life, so if I could do it again I would kill him twice,
When I seen you lying there I losted my mind, my baby? My precious gem, carrying a child by a man I chose.
Sorry Baby, if you would have only told.

R.I.P. To those that gave up without a fight, tell someone before you decide to take your life. —San~D Mental Thought

Stranger Of Mine

"I should have left you at hello, but I was anxious to get to know, You, I had to understand your personality and way of life, I wish I missed that plane, and boarded a new flight, I wish I left you as a stranger and never said Hi, the way you say you treat me is a lie, you’re pathetic and not worth my time, I wish I left you as a stranger as I said good-bye, never looking in your eyes and falling in love, never extending my arms longing for a hug, I wish I left you as a stranger, because I wish I never met you, I wish I never cried when I finally left you, Stranger. Stranger of mine…I wish I never let you into my Life.—Mental Closet

Flawed and Aware of It

My Confession, I loved sensual fruit
And the warmth of a strong black man’s body.
Also sweet sounds of slow jams, lingering the air,
Scents, of rosehips, of warm honey.
So what kind of virgin am I? Many others
Are innocently called, timid.
Who would believe me. For they witness
How I slow grind, caress myself on the dance floor.
And the way my hands viciously attack my victims chest.
Teasing and aware of it. Desiring intimacy,
I knew what was left for unsure Mary’s like me:
A banquet of thoughts, a ton of star-filled dreams,
A constant arousal, masturbation.
—After Czeslaw Milosz

Laundromat (Metaphor Poem)

Airing out the dirty laundry after you told me you’ve been worn once,
Folding up the truth, like cleanliness is not the way.
Laying my body on dirty sheets, smelling the scent of all the lies you’ve told me,
The hot cycle on pale days, the cold cycle on hot ones,
Just wanting to snuggle against the warm body which I belong to,
After all we’ve been here before, headed to the Laundromat to air out your
Dirty laundry, after I got you supposedly fresh and new.
Now you’re dirty, filthy.
That’s why I have my “soap, powder, bleach, fabric softner,
Your dirty drawls”, I’m heading to the Laundromat with all of your wrongs.

"Don’t Get Offended By What You Read, It All Sums Up My Life, In A Couple of Spaces, Capitalizations, and Italic letters.—Mental Closet"

Love Qualifications

Love Qualifications

Woman to Man
Do you have the potential of the man I need you to be, you say you’re looking for love, Well come and take a walk with me, I can’t tell you much right now, but what my vision of a good man should be, I have related that in each one of my poetry, because see I’m not desprite, and love I already have that, it’s that passionate love that im looking for, the love that I can grow from after being my friend, my future man will understand that life with me would be more than a chance, but a gift as I lift him up and make him better, as he inspire me to follow my dreams telling me, “I can be whatever”, it’s that type of love that’s so deep, that I wouldn’t mind caressing you from the top of your head to the bottom of your feet, life with you would really mean that much to me, so I wouldn’t need a dice rolled twice to feel your luck, Ima feel like your only woman just by your gentle touch, and if we have problems we would work them out, get it together like no doubt, if you want kids I will give you that, so they can also see not only a great father, but what a real man should be, because I never had a father, but searching for love in any man I didn’t bother because I knew the power of God, so as he lead, I followed and he brought me to you , I never had a map, or one blue’s clues, Future husband you will be my light, and even if we’re both angry we will never fight, but disagree because it would be over something petty like how much you mean to me because that you’ll never know, for my heart appreciation, I could never show, but im grateful and you’ll be my man only and be faithful, my bestfriend, my heart, my future, I’ll be so happy to chose ya because you’ll be everything to me, now I have one question DO YOU QUALIFY TO BE THE FUTURE HUSBAND I NEED YOU TO BE?

"MENTAL THOUGHT OF THE DAY: Do he love your heart or do he love your sex?"

"Our chain broke but our locket still holds the memory of me and you, whenever we want to fix it we know where to go, our hearts. —-I Love You

Rip The Greats: Whitney Houston Addition

I can't take these deaths serious! I don't understand how All the Legends are dying. This really is a message, you can just be enjoying life one night, and not wake up to see the next day. I adored Whitney Houston because of her courage to tell the world about her addiction, and take action to better herself for her fans and her daughter. Peace be with the Brown Family at this trying time. I pray for peace and a sense of relief everytime they watch a video of her, I know I do. xoxo

Here are Some Videos Of Celeb Tributes:

Life Busy Moments

I've been really busy lately, school is kicking my butt and we're not really doing anything. I guess I just need to learn to be organize and put priorities first. However, I have a really hard time doing anything that I don't find interesting or related to my dreams. I haven't been anywhere to take pictures or bring back any wild stories. I have been being a Twitter Whore lately Ha :), I really love to dance so I was being silly Friday and made a Twerk Video to Teyana Taylor's new song Bad Boy. It was after she made a tweet saying she want to see ladies dance to her song. I am Wild and Carefree. I mean I NEVER care what other people think of me, however, I am a lady first and foremost but sometimes I like to bring out my inner Mercy (Dancer Ego) and Prima Donna (Alter Ego).  I stay fit that way, I dance and have fun to keep my weight down.

For Video Click Link:  http://twitvid.com/SENAV